Wednesday, May 22, 2013

FIVE LESSONS I'VE LEARNED THAT EVEN OPRAH WOULD BE PROUD...

Click Here for Pic


I'm tired.  I'm exhausted.  I have been working crazy hours with this new job and I just haven't quite figured out how to balance my life.  I wanted to touch base with you and share with you some lessons that I have re-learned of late.

1) Be a person of your word.
Be true to your word.   Be on time.  Make good on your promises.  Remember, your word is your honor. 

2) Fake it until you make it.
Let's face it, we all have issues with self-esteem and/or self confidence.  From time to time, we all could  do to pretend we are more confident than we actually are.  Choose wisely and pretend.  It may just work for you.

3) Know your tipping point.
In any situation whether it be with an "okay" boyfriend or a "comfortable" job, there will come a time when tough decisions will have to be made.  Know what your tipping point.  Make the tough decision.

4) Enjoy more.  Relax more.  And Take Naps.
Pretty self-explanatory, right?  I don't know about you, but I LOVE naps.  We could all do to take more of them.

5) Laugh...Often!
Laughter is healing medicine for the soul.  It can lift your spirits.  Beyond smiles, it can always brighten even the darkest of moments.

Take these lessons.  Apply them every day.


FINAL THOUGHTS:
1)   I'm happy to report that I'm editing my second book!
2)  I think my radio interview went well on Tuesday.  I haven't heard otherwise yet.  The host even wanted to speak to me afterward.  Playing phone tag.  Perhaps more interviews?
3)  I want to thank my client this evening who was the inspiration for this blog.

Click Here for Quote


A Smile From The Inside Production :)

Thursday, May 16, 2013

THE JITTERS, CRITTERS, AND FRITTERS OF STARTING A NEW JOB...YOU WON'T WANT TO MISS THIS!







Oh boy.  Here I am.  Starting a new job.  Technically, it's a consulting gig, but I really would LOVE it to go perm.  In case you don't know, that's HR speak for permanent.  Truth be told, I had already started this job from the comfort of my “virtual office” two weeks prior, but you know how it is.  Sometimes when you end one position and start another…you might get some initial projects, etc...  Nope, for me, it was actually 110! gung-ho from the beginning.  In fact, over the past fourteen days, I had worked all day at my menial filing and scanning position (for which I am still grateful) and then at night, I would work on the fascinating world of re-orgs, org charts, and manager reconciliations -- even pulling two all-nighters because the CEO needed that information.  Might I add, I was happy to do so as they compensation is finally on-par with that I believe I'm worth.  Yeehaa!  That's an incredible feeling.

I figured today I could share some of the lessons I have learned based upon my experience of literally having over 32 jobs in over 32 years of my life.  And for those of you trying to figure out how that breaks down, kindly note that I had about half of those jobs between the ages of 15 and 22 AND I have also been a consultant for the past three years with various clients in between.  I have actually contemplated writing a book with a similar title.  We’ll see how this blog post goes first.


1)  Jitters.

Jitters.  Everyone's got the first day jitters.  The following are some suggestions for you.  Take them or leave them.

Our Inner Thoughts:  Will they like me?  Will I like them?  I wonder where I'm sitting.  I hope I make a great first impression with everyone.  This time, I'm going to get an office, I'm sure of it.  I hope I don't sit next to that lady who shares way too much of her personal life and prevents me from doing my work.  Oh god.  What if they don't like me?  I hope I don't get any major Here I go!

My Thoughts of Encouragement:  All of these thoughts are completely normal.  Yes, ALL of them.  Play it cool.  You might sit next to the chatty girl no matter if you have an office or not.  Even managers/supervisors get a little nervous for your first day for a myriad of other reasons, which we can discuss in another blogpost.  On your first day, remember that patience is always a virtue.  You'll soon probably find yourself more frustrated with the eighteen-hundred HR forms that you either have to physically sign (ouch...my hand hurts) or that you must electronically sign (ugh...could that print get any smaller?).  Between the HR Forms and the annoying but necessary IT set ups, you'll definitely need a drink at lunch!  Is that even allowed these days?  Anyway...just go with it.  First days are always a bit of a wash.  Be who you are from the beginning.


2)  Critters.

Critters.  The Critters are the funny and/or unique personalities you are about to come across.  I share with you my knowledge from some crazy-ass experiences.  Again, you might not need these suggestions today, but perhaps one day in the very near future.

Our Inner Thoughts:  Who is this again?  I am so embarrassed.  I have already asked her name like two times.  Ugh.  Can I trust him?  He irks me a little.  Note to self -- I don't know if he and I are always going to play nice.  Well, that was kind of short.  Or the ever-fun, Jeez', I am going to have be careful around that one, she would NOT stop talking.  I really don't want to see pictures of the other five offices.  Not right now at least.  I have so much work to get done right now, if you only knew.  Did he really just say that?  Oh wow.  There is some political baggage there, especially since Person A used to report to Person B, and now it's the reverse.  I definitely do not want to get caught up in that crossfire!  Is everyone crazy?  

My Thoughts of Encouragement:  For your first few days, try and reserve judgments on anyone and everyone.   Observe everything.   Just people watch.  Spoke when spoken to.   Yes, everyone is crazy in their own right.  That's what makes us the most amazing creatures on the planet (apart from Maggie, my Frenchie, and my goats).  No quick judgments.  I know it's hard, but trust me.  People will always reveal themselves in due time.  You will slowly find out who to trust.  You will also in time figure out who the key people are and who you might want to avoid.  Understanding the temperature of the political canvass is extremely important.  The sooner you learn, the better for everyone. 


3)  Fritters.
Fritters.  For me, when starting a new job, the most awkward time of the day is lunch.  Choose wisely!  

Our Inner Thoughts:   What am I going to do?  Why didn't I bring my lunch?  Everyone else is going out, I feel like such a loser.  I don't even know what's around here?  Do I ask?  Or should I just google map it?  What am I going to do tomorrow?  What if no one asks me out to lunch?  Or if they do take me to lunch, what do I order?  I really want a burger right now -- major comfort food style, but everyone will be watching what I get.  Perhaps the soup and salad combo?  I don't know.  Do I offer to pay for lunch?  Do I just not say anything?  Why is this so uncomfortable?  I hope not every lunch is going to feel this way.

My Thoughts of Encouragement:  You cannot tell me you have NEVER asked yourself any of the above questions on your first day.  It is completely natural to feel everything listed there.  Chillax.  Ask questions about the nearby lunch places.  You never know when and where you might discover the best new hole in the wall sushi joint.  Food – when ordering in or ordering at a restaurant -- just go with the salad option... always.  On your first day, you definitely don’t want to put your rather specific dietary restrictions out there for the whole world to see, right?   Make it simple.  Just order the salad with salmon/tuna.  That’s what I did yesterday.  No weird looks.  No offending anyone.  Everyone respects the salar choice.  If you are like me, you could care less about the COOL kids or the COOL gang.  Believe in yourself.  Believe that you are the COOL Kid and you will be.  I mean, it's just lunch, after all.


Listen, it’s always going to be nerve-racking when starting a new job.  Enjoy the nerves.  It means you are alive and kicking.  That’s something for all of us to be grateful for, right?  Take a deep breathe.  Live one day at a time.  Be the best you can be.


FINAL THOUGHTS:
1)  Don't forget.  Next Tuesday, I have a radio appearance on The Donna Seebo Show, May 21at at 9am ( pst ). Check her out here... Look for my name!  I'm a little nervous.
2)  I started PT/Fitness Therapy for my ligament-repaired left ankle.  It kicked my tukhus.

"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes 
it has gone through to achieve that beauty."


A Smile From The Inside Production :)

Thursday, May 9, 2013

FOUR THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW BEFORE YOU START YOUR OWN BLOG!


Click Here for Beautiful Pic of Vietnam

Life is vast, crazy, and full of surprises...just like the above pic.

As I'm building my way to success, slowly but surely, through accolades and simple praise for my featured blogs in the Huffington Posts, GreenlightJobs.com, and International coaching Federation sites, I have discovered the following concepts. AND since some of you have been curious about starting your own blogs, I thought I would save you the trouble of learning from my failures and mistakes. 

1.  Editorial contents are cute, but not necessary!

Believe it or not, I literally have four months full of editorial content for this blog?  Meaning, if I was ever stumped for a weekly blog topic, I could casually refer to my awesome Excel worksheet, find my next suggested/pre-planned topic scheduled, and go with God.  Would you believe that I have never EVER had to peruse my enthusiastically ambitious list for a topic?  I don't know what it is about me that I seem to always find a delicious concept on which to explore.  It's a delicate combination of inspiration, irritation, or pure good times!  


2.  Never underestimate the importance of a catchy title. 

Catchy titles rule the roost. And who should know better about hens than me, right?  But, I digress.

Titles are in my opinion more important than good writing.   And I am not in a Marketer.  I mean, I don't know about you, but I have read some terrible blog posts.  Upworthy has taught me a little bit about securing attention by having the most amazing and exhilarating titles of all.  Check them out!  Why just yesterday, they came out with this:  "The Classy Way to Take On People Who Hate You!" or "Some Strange Things Are Happening To Astronauts Returning To Earth!"  You are just hooked from the very start.  That's what you need to do.  I'm getting better, but sometimes I fall back into my old patterns.  Thoughts?

3.  Never judge your writing by its own cover!

I wish I could predict which blogs will do better than others, but I have learned differently.  Let's face it...sometimes you can spend hours or even days on one blog.  Sometimes by the time you submit or publish the blog, you are OVER it.  At least that happens to me.  Oddly enough, the blogs which I still LOVE at the submission point are usually the ones where no one will comment.  It's the blogs that I am completely OVER that seem to generate the biggest buzz amongst my readers.  Similarly with my first blog article for the Huffington post, 9-Million Strong and Counting.  It was actually a sample blog.  It wasn't even finalized.  They LOVED it.  Huh?  I was so confused.  So, never judge your writing by your feelings.  Trust that someone will enjoy it.  

4.  Don't just post everywhere and every two hours.  Post strategically. 

Annoying your friends is NOT the way to go.  I'm sure we've all done it though.  With each post, add some value to your fb/twitter companions.  People are more likely to "Like" or "Share" if they find significant value or identify strongly with your introduction blurbs.  I need to remember this more.  Also, be strategic in the posting times.  There are higher traffic times throughout certain parts of the day, like, between 1 and 2pm, and between 5 and 7pm.  Who knows why?  Do research and find out more highly trafficked time!

Small little ideas:  Be brief.  Make clear points.  And please please double-check your spelling.  One mistake, no worries.  Two mistakes, okay.  Three mistakes...ugh.  :)

That's it for now, my friends.  Take care and remember, Your Best is Always Yet To Come.  xoxo.



FINAL THOUGHTS:
1)  Next radio appearance will be on The Donna Seebo Show, May 21at at 9am ( pst ). Check her out here... Look for my name!  Yay!
2)  Check out this hilarious little article re: French Bulldogs!
3)  After months of searching, I start a new HR Operations consulting gig next week.  I might even get to travel to Sioux Falls, South Dakota.  It's all very exciting!  Hopefully, it will turn full time over the next few months!  Wish me luck!
4)  Have an incredible week!
5)  Major shout out to Delaware!!!  Rock on!!!  Soo, everyone will be able to get married except for California and New York, where statistically there are probably more gays than in all other states combined.  Just saying!  :)



A Smile From The Inside Production :)

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

MATCHES AND QUIVERS AND GAY-BEARS, OH MY! ONLINE DATING! YIKES!


Click Here for Pic

Over the past four days, I have taken my own advice from my newly published article at the Huffington Post and I have joined two separate online dating sites:  OneGoodLove.com and okcupid.com.  It has been quite the experience.  I mean, after I answered eighty some-odd questions, you would think that I should win a prize or something.  Nope, I won 4,000 matches.  Ugh.  I have laughed.  I have cried.  And I have ewww'ed and awwww'ed many times.

It's overwhelming.  It could easily become an addiction.  And for someone who's not walking all that much (me), it is crazy how much I have found myself on those two sites.  After just 24-hours, I had to set some boundaries and ground rules.  It was intense, man.  

I don't know all the rules yet nor do I understand the nuances of saying hello.  For example, I don't know what to say to people when reaching out to them for the first time.  Do you say, "Hey"?  Do you say, "Your pic is sexy and I liked your profile"?  I have no idea.  I've been a little generic, "Hey.  I think you're sexy and I really enjoyed your profile...Check out mine and see if we might be a match!"

However, if I REALLY like them, I'll be cute and make a joke about our mutual obsession for Harry Potter, Six Feet Under, or Almodovar.  Who knows what's best?  The sad thing is...you can actually see who's "visited" your profile.  So, if you send them a message, you can review later on to see if they at least checked out your pictures.  Um...I don't know if that's the best way to boost anyone's ego, but it definitely supports everyone's self-worth work around rejection.  

Tell me!  When is too early to ask them about children?  I'm serious!  I want to find a partner to love and be loved.  I want to start a family within the next 3-5 years.  I never know if I should ask or not.

I have discovered a few interesting things though.  Don't "Facetime" with someone right away.  It's just too much pressure and then you are stuck!  Don't give them your number until you are sure they are not psycho.  That should be at least 50-75 messages in.

The most interesting thing I have discovered is the somewhat shallow part that exists inside me.  I have realized if the potential suitor is less than a six (on a 1 to 10 scale of looks) in his first three pics, I move on and do NOT read his profile.  In speaking with other people, it turns out I'm normal and not a pretentious and superficial prick.  Thank God.

I admit, reluctantly, that it has been quite the ego boost.  Well...it has been quite the ride.

I'm giving it one month in total and then I'm bowing out.  I think I'd like to meet my mate at some other place like an LA gay pool party, a LGBT fundraising event, or the illustrious after-hours parties.  A boy can dream, right?

I'm gonna keep this blog short, so you can all check out my second article on the Huffington Post.



FINAL THOUGHTS:
1)  Being off crutches is amazing!!!  I can almost walk a quarter of a mile without getting winded.
2)  Check out my good friend, Duane Wells talk about Airocide, recently featured on Ellen.  It looks like an amazing product!
3)  I love this beautiful and romantic pic of DisneyLand Paris.  I'm just feeling the romantic vibes this week...or at least trying to.
4)  Thanks again for all of your support.  Let me know what you think about Online Dating!!

Click Here for Pics
A Smile From The Inside Production :)